Nemesis (1992) -

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Ok, am I missing something, or was this movie just hot garbage? What is there to like about Nemesis? Shitty writing and acting, cheesy costumes and props, outdated effects, and a plot which is just downright boring make this seem like a student film that got the budget of a B-tier film in the 70s. Let’s go one by one.

First off is the writing and acting. I don’t care how low budget your film is: if your writing is shit, your movie is shit. We can easily turn this movie into a drinking game by taking a shot every time someone unnecessarily addresses their conversation partner by their name. Seriously, this is just bad. Somehow the best writing of the entire film is found in the broken english of Angie. Besides the writing, the actors don’t do too hot either. Gruner’s brute and monotone character are reminiscent of Schwarzenegger, and when you realize this mid film, it’s hard to do much besides compare the two. And in basically every aspect Schwarzenegger wins.

We’ve got a lot more to get through so let’s move on. The costumes and props for this are a mess. Look, I get it. We’re in a cyberpunk era, but that doesn’t mean the guns need to look so damn bad. The Lego-like blasters make every gunfight scene tragically comedic, not to mention the Star Wars-esque “gunshots.” My biggest problem, however, lies in the headsets these LAPD cyborgs are wearing. Why in God’s good name do these cyborgs need earpieces? Why? And why do they look so damn goofy? They can install surveillance systems that can listen to your thoughts but they can’t communicate without a Turtle Beach headset on? I get that Nemesis is trying to be a bit different but this is just not where that attempt needs to be made.

On to the effects. It felt like over half the budget was just spent on explosions. To an extent I can appreciate this because I do love myself some good, fiery booms, but this was just excessive. Nearly every fight scene had to involve some form of explosion and I just can’t seem to understand why. Besides the explosion what the HELL was the endoskeleton about? I won’t spoil anything about this, but it truly is just something you have to see to believe. Sidenote: I also found out that in the Japanese and German blu-ray versions, the scene involving the endoskeleton never actually takes place, and there’s an alternate ending. Check out the Wikipedia page for the movie if you’re interested in that. Anyways, I found myself giggling and throwing basically any credibility for this movie out the window.

Let’s wrap things up with the plot. In theory, this concept was interesting and fun. But I would be lying if I said that it was done well. I felt like things were randomly overexplained or brought up multiple times in an attempt to clarify something that no one was confused about, and the things that could have actually used some explanation were just entirely ignored. I had to go through and read the plot summary after watching just to make sure I understood everything. I’m sure most of this was just me being stupid, but I do feel like I tried my best to follow along. Regardless, the plot isn’t inherently awful, but it is boring and done in a way which I feel like doesn’t do the potential job justice. So, what does the movie do well? Well, not a whole lot. I planned on giving Nemesis a mere 1.5 stars, but when I read reviews mentioning the budget and I went on to find out it was only $2 million, I felt like that within itself was worthy of a 0.5 star bump-up. Honestly, what Pyun was able to do on such a small budget is quite impressive. I did enjoy the cyberpunk yet almost apocalyptic scenery, and the budget does make everything start to make sense. Now, I can’t just go around handing great ratings to movies that don’t deserve it just because they did some coolish stuff with a small budget, but I think it is certainly significant.

Ultimately, what’s the consensus? Should you watch it? Probably not. Maybe. Who cares. Listen, you’re not going to miss out if you die without having watched Nemesis, but if the concept seems interesting enough to you, it may be worth turning on in the background while you crochet or build Lego or something. Honestly, you’ll probably like it more than I did. Maybe I’m being too hard on it. I guess it’s all up to you to decide.